Snivels of the Circus – Chapter Five on Self-Publishing

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Snivels of the Circus – Chapter Five on Self-Publishing

I’ve mentally started this thing I call Project Papillion.  It means trying to free myself and a few others from the prison of the service industry.  The aim being that someday soon we’ll be able to make a living off the things we really enjoy doing.  But if you’re familiar with the cinematic namesake of the project, you’ll know the irony.  The prisoners never exactly, fully escape form the island prison.

Anyroad.  This presently involves juggling many projects, and often feeling like I’m neglecting my novel.  I think that’s in my head though.  Like when I go out on the razz instead of staying at home with my cat, and she makes me feel as guilty as possible the next day.  By bullying me when I’m weak.

It’s difficult enough juggling three objects (day job, novel editing and social life).  I have to give myself a few extra flaming balls to deal with (two blogs, sit-com project, planning a multi-media event and agreeing to edit a book of short stories for my writing group).  And all that’s before you get to the subcatagories in your to-do list which connect all these.

It’s a bit too easy to prioritise the fun stuff, and keep putting off the difficult or boring stuff.  I’ve reached tipping point on this issue, and know it’s time to get my head down.  Sadly, my flat is currently a nest of snotty tissues, and as well as losing vital hours at work (I do the absolute minimum in order to have time for other stuff), I’ve lost important editing time.  I did try, but then I realised my slow, snivelling brain was probably adding more mistakes than correcting.

I seem to have got my brain back this afternoon, though this very blog may be a string of nonsense eating the face off more nonsense, I’m not sure.  It’s easy in this weak, frustrated state to feel that my life’s a circus I’ve lost control of.  The whirl of colour and bright lights blurring my focus.  But as always I know worrying won’t help.  Time to take a deep Yogic breath, give myself a break, and resume full-speed when I know I’m back on form.

Over & owt


Previous chapters –

Chapt 4 (Cynical Optimism)

Chapt 3 (Heed My Battle Cry)

Chapt 2 (Fortune Favours the Brave)

Chapt 1 (Literally Fiction)

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